Your ARMY TIMES subscription expired and you were forced to buy toilet paper.
You consider chewing REDMAN as good as brushing you teeth.
You spend more money at the CAV STORE than you do on your wife.
You get aroused at a gun show.
Your kids favorite reading books are the CASKA series.
You don't know anyone who owns less than 10 guns.
You think the smell of BREAKFREE makes a woman sexier.
You were fired from your civilian job as a construction worker because of your
vulgar language.
Yeah....you too might be a Ranger if you gave your wife a GPS (with batteries)
for your anniversary.