The background to this story is that in the military we have a CQ (Charge of Quarters). That person is in charge of keeping everything "secure" in the dormitory areas. You have a log book for doing your hourly checks etc. Our CQ duty was brought onto us as a punishment so pulling your 8 hour shift is VERY boring.
This Airman had a little fun in the book.
0800: All's clear on the western front
0815: Fought off small rebel group of squirrels attempting to plunder trash. Apparent leader of the insurgence escaped to nearby bush, eventually retreating to palm tree. However leader did not escape unscathed, pride was wounded and credibility in command ability was called into question by subordinate squirrels. A coup d'etat seems inevitable.
- All doors secure.
0900: noisy squirrels discussing strategy and new policies involving the plundering of dorm residents trash eliminated. Rock thrown into the center of the group, quieted apparent plotting.
- All Secure.
0915: Loud Music coming out of 327, so i went in and turned my radio down.
- All Secure.
1000: Squirrels enlisted seagulls, air raid eminent, and threat level high.
- All Secure
1015: Air raid in progress; hostiles numerous. Attempting to subdue the enemy with loud yelling, Enemy gaining ground may have to retreat to overhang.
1100: Last stand. Squirrels and Seagulls, tenacious, highly motivated and organized threatening to overrun encampment. The fight has been long and hard. But I am determined to win the day and defend the life and limb this good land and these good people. Will respond with force.
- All Secure
1115: Deeply engaged in a battle of wits and wills. War IS hell. The things I've seen since I assumed my post are enough to trouble my sleep.
- All Secure.
1200: Have won the war, but lost peace of mind. I will never be the same. Enemy has retreated, the threat eliminated. Dorm residents safe and secure
-All Secure.
HOME Rebel Group of Squirrels