BAYONET CHARGE...
MISTAKEN ADDRESS "Who is on the phone?" the general asked his secretary....
Stupidity in Aliens That I Never Knew Before By Dean Kanipe Area 51 Research Center While viewing the film Independence Day, it became apparent that I was remarkably uninformed about several things related to Area 51, aliens, military operations, and America in general. Below is a quick list of a few important things I learned from the film that I never knew before, and a few lessons that were inferred from the plot. I wish to thank the creators of ID4 for making these facts much clearer to me. ...
RECRUITING CATCH...
GREAT PROMINENCE...
REAL SOLDIER When Americans had no end of troubles with launching a rocket there was a suggestion: "Name that rocket 'Soldier'."...
Looking for a wife This war veteran is looking for a suitable wife, so he decides to call up some numbers randomly and hopes for the best!...
Two sailors were on leave for the weekend and were bored out of their minds. The first sailor turns to the second and says,"hey, let's go get ourselves drunk!"...
Old war injury.. This guy walks up to a urinal to take a piss. While he's standing there doing his thing he looks to his left and sees this other guy pissing in two directions at the same time. What's wrong with your dick he askes.. - It's just an old war injury. I took a bullet in Vietnam....
Military Jokes. Military humor...
A seargent is teaching a private how to use a grenade. The seargent gives the orders. "Private, stand 40 feet away from me. Pull the pin. Now throw the grenade and hit the dirt!" "Here, catch," replies the private. In two years the seargent and the private meet in heaven. "How the hell did you get here," asks the seargent? "I don't know," replies the private, "last thing I remember is begin surrounded by the enemy. I pulled out a grenade, pulled the pin. They all ran away, so I just put the grenade back into my pocket."...
General Dye ...
Adolf Hitler was conducting a General Staff meeting, when somebody sneezed...
On a military training exercise, the British divisional command radio operators were getting very bored one quiet night, when breaking the silence a voice asked over the air, "Are there any friendly bears listening?"...
Q & A ...
An Army private filling out a questionnaire for a correspondence course was stymied by the question, "How long has your present employer been in business?" He thought for a moment, then wrote, "Since 1776."...
And That's The Way It Is ...
SAS Training...
Style and fashion intrude into all walks of our lives. Two fellows who had been rivals all their lives followed different career paths. One eventually became an Admiral in the Navy, the other went into the Catholic Church and became a Bishop....
Enemy attack The Ecuadorian captain had grown increasingly anxious over rumors of an impending air strike from neighboring Peru. "Pedro," he ordered his aide-de-camp, "I want you to climb that mountain and report any signs of Peruvian military activity." ...
Gold bars...
WW II fighter pilot...
Military jokes and humor...
The Chief In Sex Ed Class...
Military Jokes. Military humor...
BOOTCAMP...
During World War I, Strachey, having applied for an exemption from compulsory military service as a conscientious objector, was required to appear before a tribunal, whose representative blasted him with questions designed to intimidate:
"I understand, Mr. Strachey, that you have a conscientious objection to all wars?" he began.
"Oh, no, not at all," Strachey remarked. "Only to this one."
"Tell me, Mr. Strachey, what would you do if you saw a German soldier attempting to rape your sister?"
"I should try," Strachey replied, gazing at his sisters in the public gallery, "and come between them."...
A Navy officer was cutting through the crew's quarters of his ship one day and happened upon a sailor reading a magazine with his feet up on the small table in front of him. "Sailor! Do you put your feet up on the furniture at home?", the officer demanded.
"No, sir, but we don't land airplanes on the roof either."...
Military Jokes. Military humor...
Conscientious Objector...
What a Maroon!...

HOME