1. When out in public you feel the urge to snap
your fingers at children you do not know and correct their behavior
2. When you mention "Vegetables" you're not talking
about a food group
3. You can tell if it's a full moon without
ever looking outside
4. You can't have children because there's no name
you could give a child that wouldn't bring on
high blood pressure the moment you heard it uttered
5. You think caffeine should be available in intravenous form
6. Meeting a child's parent instantly answers
the question "Why is this kid like this?"