Returning from Remote
HEADQUARTERS
U.S. ARMY
APO 001. U.S. ARMY
AG 1010.99.99 (DECCA)
SUBJECT: Indoctrination for Return to U.S.
TO: All Units.
1. In compliance with current policies for rotation of armed
forces overseas it is directed that in order to maintain the high
standard of character of the American Soldier and to prevent any
dishonor to reflect on the uniform all individuals eligible for
return to the U.S. under current directives will undergo an
indoctrination course of demilitarisation prior to approval of
hisapplication for return.
2. The following points will be emphasized in the subject
indoctrinationcourse:-
a. In America there is a remarkable number of beautiful girls.
These young ladies have not been liberated and many are gainfully
employed as stenographers, sales girls, beauty operators or
welders. Contrary to current practice they should not be
approached with "How much?". A proper greeting is
"Isn't it a lovely day?" or "Have you ever been to
Chicago?". Don't say "How much?".
b. A guest in a private home is usually awakened in the morning
by a light tapping on his door, and an invitation to join the
host at breakfast. It is proper to say "I'll be there
shortly". DO NOT say "Blow it out your ass".
c. A typical American breakfast consists of such strange foods as
cantolopes, fresh eggs, milk, ham, etc. These are highly
palatable and though strange in appearance are extremely tasty.
Butter, made from cream, is often served. If you wish some
butter, you turn to the person nearest it and say quietly
"Please pass the butter". DO NOT say "Throw me the
damn grease".
d. Very natural urges are apt to occur when in a crowd. If it is
found necessary to defecate, one does NOT grab a shovel in one
hand and paper in the other and run for the garden. At least 90%
of American homes have one room called the "Bathroom",
i.e. a room that, in most cases, contains a bathtub, wash basin,
medicine cabinet, and a toilet. It is the latter that you will
use in this case. (Instructors should make sure that all
personnel understand the operation of toilet, particularly the
lever or button arrangement that serves to prepare the device for
reuse).
e. In the event the helmet is retained by the individual, he will
refrain from using it as a chair, wash bowl, foot bath or
bathtub. All these devices are furnished in the average American
Home. It is not considered good practice to squat Indian fashion
in a corner in the event all chairs are occupied. The host
usually will provide suitable seats.
f. Belching or passing wind in company is strictly frowned upon.
If you should forget about it, however, and belch in the presence
of others, a proper remark is "Excuse me". DO NOT say
"It must be that lousy chow we've been getting".
g. American dinners, in most cases, consist of several items,
each served in a separate dish. The common practice of mixing
various items, such as corn-beef and pudding, or lima beans and
peaches, to make it more palatable will be refrained from. In
time the "Separate Dish" system will become enjoyable.
h. Americans have a strange taste for stimulants. The drinks in
common usage on the Continent, such as underripe wine, alcohol
and grapefruit juice, or gasoline bitters and water (commonly
known by the French as "Cognac") are not usually
acceptable in civilian circles. A suitable use for such drinks is
for serving one's landlord in order to break an undesirable
lease.
i. The returning soldier is apt to find often that his opinions
differ from those of his civilian associates. One should call
upon his reserve etiquette and correct his acquaintance with such
remarks as "I believe you have made a mistake", or
"I am afraid you are in error on that". DO NOT say
"Brother, you're really screwed up". This is considered
impolite.
j. Upon leaving a friend's home after a visit, one may find his
hat misplaced. Frequently it has been placed in a closet. One
should turn to one's host and say "I don't seem to have my
hat. Could you help me find it?". DO NOT say "Don't
anybody leave this room, some S.O.B. has stolen my hat".
k. In traveling in the U.S., particularly in a strange city, it
is often necessary to spend the night. Hotels are provided for
this purpose and almost anyone can give directions to the hearest
hotel. Here, for a small sum, you can register and be shown to a
room where he can sleep for the night. The present practice of
entering the nearest house, throwing the occupants into the yard
and taking over the premises will cease.
l. Whiskey, a common American drink, may be offered to the
soldier on social occasions. It is considered a reflection on the
uniform to snatch the bottle from the hostess and drain the
bottle, cork and all. All individuals are cautioned to exercise
extreme control in these circumstances.
m. In motion picture theaters seats are provided. Helmets are not
required. In is NOT considered good form to whistle every time a
female over 8 and under 80 crosses the screen. If vision is
impaired by the person in the seat in front, there are plenty of
other seats which can be occupied. DO NOT hit him across the back
of the head and say "Move your head, jerk, I can't see a
damn thing".
n. It is not proper to go around hitting everyone of draft age in
civilian clothes. He might have been released from the service
for medical reasons. Ask for his credentials, and if he can't
show any THEN go ahead and slug him.
o. Upon retiring, one will often find a pair of pajamas laid out
on the bed. (Pajamas, it should be explained, are two-piece
garments which are donned after all clothing has been removed.)
The soldier, confronted by these garments, should assume an air
of familiarity and not act as though he were not used to them. A
casual remark such as "My, what a delicate shade of
blue" will usually suffice. Under NO circumstances say
"How in hell do you expect me to sleep in a get-up like
that?".
p. Natural functions will continue. It may frequently be
necessary to urinate. DO NOT walk behind the nearest tree or
automobile you find to accomplish this. Toilets (see 2d above)
are provided in all public buildings for this purpose.
q. Beer is sometimes served in bottles. A cap remover is usually
available, and it is not good form to open the bottle by the use
of one's teeth.
r. Always tip your hat before striking a lady.
s. Air raids and enemy patrols are not encountered in America.
Therefore it is not necessary to wear the helmet in church or at
social gatherings, or to hold the weapon at ready, loaded and
cocked, when talking to civilians in the street.
t. Every American home and all hotels are equipped with bathing
facilities. When it is desired to take a bath, it is not
considered good form to find the nearest pool or stream, strip
down, and indulge in a bath. This is particularly true in heavily
populated areas.
u. All individuals returning to the U.S. will make every effort
to conform to the customs and habits of the regions visited, and
to make themselves as inconspicuous as possible. Any actions
which reflect upon the honor of the uniform will be promptly
dealt with.